This too shall pass, amigos!

Today is my last day of law school.

I have finally reached that light at the end of what often seemed like a never-ending tunnel.

I know I have not blogged in a few weeks or months (yet, again) however, this post is officially my last as a technical 3L law student. Of course, I do have some additional work to fulfill prior to graduating (an article, a research project, and a take-home final exam). So I will be kept busy in the next couple of weeks, but as far as classes are concerned, today, Thursday, April 12, 2012, it all ends by 8:05pm or so (depending on how long my final Negotiation class lasts).

And wow, I just cannot sleep today. Blame it on the double shot espresso at Starbucks, or rather on the excitement of being done . . . three years of law school are finally over!

All those moments of feeling like running away or hiding until the work went away (which might be somewhat realistic and occur again considering the work I have to still complete in the next few weeks) are soon to be finally at their end. Next, comes moving back to the west coast (yay!) and beginning my bar exam studying (ugh). But, let's focus on happy things instead.

Like for example, my survival of law school through hot sauce, salsa, and other spicy foods. I attempted to limit my intake while in law school, partly to not get sick (I used to eat pure hot sauce as a snack, before breakfast, when I was in elementary school which you can imagine was not good for my health), but also in order to make my stash of goodies last until either my next visit home or my next survival package. I should add that apparently some research has proven that there are nutrients in most peppers that contain chemicals that produce endorphins, which in turn make a person eating those peppers feel happy. Google it if you don't believe me.

To me this research makes complete sense because whenever I am feeling stressed or overwhelmed, I can definitely boost my attitude by enjoying some spicy Mexican candy, some chips or popcorn with hot sauce (yes, they taste awesome), or else simply add some chili powder or salsa to whatever meal I might be eating.

So yes, spicy foods are quite importante on my list. And they can be credited to my survival of some dire momentos, particularly those while I've been in law school!

But another extremely important contribution for my completion of law school has been the support of my familia and my amigos and amigas.

I got a bit nostalgic this week and took time to look through some of the many notes, letters, postcards, pictures, and cards that I have received since I began law school, and wow, I am sooo blessed! From encouraging words, to reminders of God's character, to simply notes indicating their love for me, all my familia and my amigos and amigas are simply incredible!

And I am so thankful for getting this far. We did it! I know that I have not been alone. Even when I questioned so much (and so often), yet my heavenly Father did not leave me, not once.

I have been listening to the Britt Nicole song, "All This Time" pretty much on repeat this week. This YouTube video of the song (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r8xv3Qy3dtg&feature=related) is extremely on point for me since I can definitely attest that throughout my time in law school, most of those Bible passages shown in the video have been essential to my life, every single day.

Like the lyrics of the song share, for me, it is very true that:

"All this time, from the first tear cried,

'til today's sunrise,

and every single moment between,

You were there,

You were always there,

it was You and I,

You've been walking with me,

all this time."

I know that I have never been, and never will be, alone. One of my biggest lessons in life, and definitely exercised while in law school, has been my need for a continual reliance on God -- He alone gives me the ability to get through each task, each day. I am thankful that my Savior is alone ever-faithful, loving, merciful, and all-powerful. I can rest assured that no matter what life after law school brings, from the bar exam to any of the future challenges I will face, it is not ever Keila that gets things accomplished on her own. If it were, this girl would not be weeks away from graduating from law school.

Inscribed in my high school graduation announcements, and kept as a reminder on my desk in law school is the following verse (Isaiah 40:31) with a picture of Neuchswanstein Castle in Germany (a gorgeous place I visited after my first year of law school), which is a symbol that God allowed me to "mount up with wings" like an eagle that first year of law school.

As I complete this other stage of life, I pray for renewed strength and renewed focus on that which God has for me to do next. GRACIAS for reading this blog. I encourage all of you to also seek and rely on God's strength for your life.

In the Blink of an Eye...the Final Round!

Nunca sabes lo que tienes hasta que lo pierdes.
This Spanish phrase means: you never know what you have until you lose it.

This came to mind, my first semester of 1L year when I received my first survival package from my amazing familia and the other surprises from my wonderful amigas. For me, realizing I was living in a new setting, and in some ways a new culture, was a wake-up call to appreciate what I missed so much, and unfortunately, had not fully appreciated when I did have it.

The blessing now is to realize that what I thought was lost, was really only "on hold" for three years. But that first semester really seemed eternal! Getting treats from home was a treat in itself. For me, spicy foods (and candy) remind me of my casa. (Note: I will try to blog about my fascination with hot sauce, salsa, and spicy foods in a future blog.) Often, these little treats from my familia have been a reward (and comfort) I cherish during any of those difficult days I happen to face; they simply make life a little bit more bearable.

And then, somehow, in what seems like a blink of an eye (but with multiple survival packages later), here I am in the last semester of law school. This is the final round!

In fact, this past week marked the official beginning to my last three months of law school. From three years, it is now less than three months until Cinco de Mayo (or May 5th), which for Regent Law, will be more than only a traditional Mexican holiday celebration.

It just so happens, that on that day, I will get to celebrate (and commemorate) a victory not unlike the Battle of Puebla (the Mexican historic event that occurred on Cinco de Mayo), which was a small Mexican army battling against circumstances that seemed impossible to overcome. (For details on the history of Cinco de Mayo, see: http://www.history.com/topics/cinco-de-mayo). My victoria will be against three years of quite-trying circumstances and personal battles while in law school. It will be a victoria that was only a sueño (dream) at some point in my life, yet soon will be a tangible, experience-with-all-your-senses-for-less-than-24-hours, realidad.

This Cinco de Mayo, my name will officially gain the initials "J.D." after it. Two little initials that have cost more than money, but that I know are worth the cost. And, after God-willing passing that CA bar exam looming in the coming summer months, I will finally be an attorney!

However, for those of you thinking life is now smooth sailing, not so fast amigos, think again.

This past week, for example, seemed like another official "let's-see-how-much-Keila-can-handle" week. After Starbucks drinks didn't work to keep me going (by only Tuesday!), I resorted to drinking Red Bull. But, it was only after drinking some Red Bull after 5pm, that I remembered why I only drink those energy drinks if I need to pull all-nighters. I went to sleep as the sun arose; when others get up to go to work. Muy mal!

Then, think of everything that could possibly go wrong, from burning not just toast, but the entire toaster, and it most likely happened to me last week. Pretty much every single day of the entire week was a "can I please just go back to bed moment"! I was very relieved when Saturday finally arrived.

Facing those moments, helps me to see how very blessed I am to have encouraging amigos and my familia who continually keep me believing (and remind me) to keep going even when life gets wintry, figuratively and literally.

Whenever these chaotic, tiring, and insanely challenging times come, I remember the lyrics to the Barlow Girl song, "One More Round" which has pretty much been my law school theme song since 1L year:

"Round one wasn't at I thought it'd be

Round two I'm struggling to breathe

3, 4, 5, 6, 7 times I wondered why I stepped inside this ring

I may be knocked down and so bruised

But I'm here to tell you

That I may be knocked down but not for the count

So take me one more round

I'll just keep fighting

One more round

You're messing me up but I'm still here

One more round I'll come out swinging

One more round

I'm telling you now I'm not gonna lose at you

It's so hard to get up off the floor again

But I know that victory is when

I'm pushing through the pain that tries to feed me lies that I won't reach the end

I may be bloodied and so bruised

But I'm here to tell you

That I may be knocked down but not for the count . . .

I am not defeated

Though you cannot see it

I have never won a battle on my own

I find strength in weakness

I find hope in believing

God is for me who can bring me down?

So take me one more round

I'll just keep fighting."

Strength in weakness is most definitely my life motto. And I for sure have never won any battles on my own. Without God's help, I would not have made it this far. And I'm very, very thankful that for the season of law school, this is now my final round.

Why do I share all this? Well, because like I wrote at the beginning of the blog, nunca sabes lo que tienes, hasta que lo pierdes. In other words, recently, I have realized that once again, graduation will bring excitement and lots to look forward to. Yet, again my life will change, and what has become normal will soon be in the past; new transitions and experiences will once again begin. In other words, I might not miss everything about law school or about living in Virginia, but I will surely miss some of it. I guess this is a little reminder (for me and others reading) to be thankful and appreciate your life right now. Wherever you are now, this season of life, be encouraged and be thankful. Life changes in what seems like a blink of the eye; what you see now is not always going to be there.

In short, carpe diem amigos, and remember:

"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven...." Ecclesiastes 3:1

A Little Comida for Thought

Do you like Mexican food? I love it. In America and worldwide, I think it's really more than a fad. One of my favorite, unique memories of my time studying abroad in France with Regent Law, was finding a Mexican restaurant within days! It was pretty cool to read a menu in français, which was trying to describe typical Mexican food dishes. Très bien!

And actually, to some people, like myself, Mexican food is a necessity. Dare I say it? Yes, I will just say it. The world, the entire world, would simply not be the same without comida Mexicana! Am I biased? Aren't we all at some point? [Insert big smile here].

So, this blog is somewhat focused on food, Mexican food, that is, because it is one of the things I have missed pretty much everyday since I moved to Virginia. I have visited a good variety of the Mexican restaurants in the area, but well, let's just say they don't at all compare to the real, authentic comida Mexicana I grew up enjoying, freshly prepared by my abuelita, my tias, or by my wonderful mami.

But, since unfortunately I cannot eat any of my familia's authentic Mexican food while I'm three-thousand miles away, I have resorted to cooking myself. It's been interesting because it is like artwork - every meal requires time and creativity. And most of the time I have things shipped from home since I cannot find them locally. Like queso cotija (a yummy Mexican cheese) or fresh, homemade flour tortillas. If you've never had homemade flour or corn tortillas, I am sooo sorry for you! Maybe someday you can have some good amigos invite you to enter into the delicacy of authentic tortillas. (Warning: once you enjoy authentic flour tortillas, any substitute will be like eating cardboard!)

Today I didn't have tons of time to cook, so I made myself a yummy, quesadilla (with some of my priceless flour tortillas from home) to go along with some very typical sopa de coditos (think of the traditional American mac n'cheese, except no cheese and instead flavorful pasta soup). And of course I added some extra zest to it: some of my tia's salsa de chiles asados (awesome salsa made with sauteed dried chiles) and last but absolutely not least, fresh diced avocado. Muy delicioso, as pictured in the opening picture to this blog!

Also, earlier this week, I was very grateful for finding amazing looking strawberries at the grocery store and when I was about to wash them, I realized they were not only shipped from the bountiful California, but they were grown in Mexico. No wonder! Again, I do admit I am pretty biased, but the variety of fresh produce available since I have been in Virginia has not been of the greatest quality. Why? Well, when you grow up most of your life having literally freshly-picked-off-the-fields lettuce, tomatoes, and other veggies and fruits, it makes you almost cry when the fruit and vegetables found in the produce aisle do not look in the greatest condition.

Why do I share all of this? Well, first just to add some variety to my posts, and hopefully to encourage people to try some authentic comida mexicana at least at some point in their life.

But most importantly, I share it because Mexican food makes me remember my time in Mexico, not just during the summer as an intern with the Center for Global Justice (see: http://www.regent.edu/acad/schlaw/globaljustice/intern_profiles.cfm), but also during this past Christmas break at home. My family lives on the Mexico/Arizona border, and one day while in Mexico and waiting in line to come back to the United States, I took the following picture.

If you have never visited Mexico, hopefully you will go someday and experience the beautiful culture of that country. But it is guaranteed that you will also witness the tremendous needs that exist. It breaks my heart to think that so many things that are not at all right, in any way or form, happen all around that country. Every single day.

This child plays a broken harmonica to raise money to help his family. He should not have to do that -- he should be free to be a child and play a harmonica only because he wants to, not because he has a financial responsibility for his family at his very young age . I know there are many factors that come into play in this type of situation such as poverty and government corruption. However, my key concern remains on that child. My concern is on the children of Mexico, the US, and worldwide. What can I do to make sure that children can live their lives protected as children? I hope (and pray) to someday, soon, be equipped to make a positive difference and have a tangible answer to that question.

For now, maybe next time you crave Mexican food, like I do pretty much daily, please remember to pray for the children of Mexico. And of other countries worldwide. Join me in stopping, just for a bit, to process about how blessed we are, and to realize how much we have to be thankful for.

Until next time.

Empty Hands. A Full Heart.

I seriously cannot believe that it has taken me an entire two months to finally blog. Dos meses! Seriously?!? Wow, but that just shows how busy life got as soon as those weeks of final exams took over my life last semester.

I shudder at the thought of the incredible amount of late night studying, insane amount of caffeine intake (plus all the $ spent at Starbucks!), and long days of memorizing concepts in order to make sense of the fact patterns given for each essay exam! Last semester, I took five law courses, which at first glance seems okay, but not when I finally realized that I would (once again) have to study for five final exams which for the most part were 100% of my semester grade! Ugh. I had not done that to myself since 1L year. And it was not fun then. Nor was it fun putting myself through it again. No fun at all.

But, well, it's all over. And I survived! By the grace (and mercy!) of God, I passed every single one of those exams. As I shared in my previous blog, SI SE PUEDE!!! In law school, a good grade is a bonus to thank God for, but passing the course is a tremendous blessing itself!

So, here I am finally in my LAST semester of law school! Only 11 credits away from finishing and moving back to, wait for it.... wait for it.....well, moving back to the amazing state of California! I am soooooooo looking forward to it!

It brings a huge smile to my face and a warm, fuzzy, feeling in my heart to imagine myself sitting at a SoCal beach once again, with my eyes closed, facing the Pacific Ocean, while a beautiful west coast sunset over the ocean radiates on my face to the point that I can absorb its heat in full delight. Hmmm. Cannot wait for this mental picture to once again be a reality!

But, in the meantime, I'm still a 3L for a few more months. And, I'm still on the east coast where, for now, a sunrise over the ocean is what I can enjoy only if I wake up early enough and if the weather happens to cooperate that day. So here's to working steadily just a bit longer and for continuously thanking God for how incredibly faithful He's been in my life, time after time.

When I was little (age-wise, not necessarily in physical stature since not much changed there), I wondered what would happen in my life as I grew up. It's funny to remember some of the stuff I dreamed of doing...like being a rockstar and singing with a back-then-popular-teen singer (reminds me of some teen girls today!)...I'm so glad some dreams change along the way!

And "growing up" is not quite always the way we picture it. For example, after graduating from college, realizing that maybe working in American politics was not the sole reason for my existence, and after all of a sudden "accidentally" working for a law firm advocating for the wellbeing and protection of vulnerable children in the United States, I knew, somehow, my heart was finally at home.

It's interesting that often, you just know you have absolutely nada to offer, but it is those moments that apparently God is delighted in using to show you it's not about what you might have, but what He can do through you. I wish I could say that in my life I have reached out and helped hundreds of children. Or at least one child. But honestly, I can't at all say that. What I can say, is that God miraculously has poured some of His love into my heart, and that I have attempted to share it with children by smiling, hugging, and trying my best to care about the numerous children who I have been lucky to meet, and who have unbelievable stories of survival amidst incredible pain and exemplary forgiveness in their short years of life.

Often, I remember their sweet, glowing faces, and I pray for them. I know that I might not ever see them or hold their hands again, but the same heavenly Father who knows me, sees and cares for them better than I could ever attempt to do so.

So, as I finally approach the end of my last semester of law school, I thank God for the strength He's so faithfully given me to survive and keep believing in His purpose amidst what is often the dreariness of a legal education.

There are many things to look forward to in 2012. Graduation is one. California is another. And, the most important is continuing with where God leads as the next step. I am praying for the next stage of living out the dream of my very empty hands, stretched out with a heart that only our heavenly Father can continue to fill and use to share more love with the children I have yet to meet.